The Internet

“JFGI” Needs to Die in a Hole

This post will be fairly ranty. I’m not sorry. But, as always, I will try my best not to beat you over the head with anger.

So, JFGI – it stands for Just Fucking Google It. I think this is a horrible phrase to say to people and I’m going to tell you why. Bare with me. I know most of you internet-peeps are scoffing right now, but bare with me.

There is such a thing as a stupid question. It tends to be along the lines of, ‘Was Hitler simply misunderstood?’ or ‘Is it OK to be racist?’ But even then, these questions could lead to serious debate, which could open up new modes of thinking. Although, if you think those questions lead to a serious ‘yes’, then please take your debate to someone else with the patience of a saint.

So, really, is there such a thing as a stupid question? Perhaps not. The human species is constantly in production (and by that I mean babies) and it constantly needs to be taught things that ‘us adults’ learnt or figured out ‘years ago’. Gratz, ‘adult’/’young-adult’. You can work an internet browser and spell your name, perhaps answer the Pub Quiz Trivia. So shut up, sit down and teach.

This image alone is frustrating. It implies you shouldn't ask questions in school because your teachers don't give a shit about your education - especially now that YOU CAN JUST ASK FUCKING GOOGLE.

My issue today is: when did it become a bad thing to ask questions? When did humans stop being a resource of information and Google take over out interactions? Sure, there are some questions that people really should know the answer to come the age of 13, but if they don’t, then people shouldn’t feel ashamed for not asking Google first.

I mean, if you are already on the internet and don’t know how to spell something it might be quicker (and less embarrassing) if you opened a new tab and typed in the ugly word for Google to patronisingly correct you with, ‘Did you mean discombobulation?’ This is the only time you should definitely just Google something because it’s so easy, quick and correct (most of the time).

I’m writing this primary in response to internet douchery and (mainly but not limited to) young people making stupid suppositions – throwing internet tantrums because they’ve heard of something but didn’t ask anyone or anything for an answer. I want to know why these uninformed people are being pelted with JFGI-rocks and why these ‘stupid people’ are not asking questions – Google or human.

This has been bugging me for a long time, but the recent Titanic celebrations (is that the right word?) have brought this bug of mine to boiling point.

What kind of self-righteous, shunning and nasty response is JFGI? Are you lazy, or are the ‘stupid people’ lazy? The answer is: both of you are lazy.

Thanks, Deputy Prick. Are you even a real policeman? In fact, why are you policing the internet? Was I rude and/or offensive to everyone? Hang on, I'm sorry, who are you again?

If you’re already browsing on the internet, you might as well ask Google your question because it is a good resource and could save you a lot of time. But sometimes it takes hours to find a few bits of information someone online could have summarised or helped you with, and not everyone is GOOD at surfing Wiki or Google Answers.

And sometimes, people just want to ask other people what the answer might be. Why? Because talking to people is more interesting.

Not everyone was made to watch Cameron’s fucking masterpiece at the age of six; also known as Titanic (that film TRAUMATISED me for weeks. When the ship splits in half I ran out the room and hid behind the dining room table but still peeked around the chairs, table and door-frame to see why everyone was screaming out of morbid, trembling fascination).

Questions about these things – these obvious things you should be-born-with-the-answers-to – lead to discussions and duels, developments in ideas and factual pools. If you’re 14 and still don’t know about the Titanic, fine. Let someone know and we’ll tell you all about it. We’ll explain it in graphic, emotive detail until you also run behind the dining table weeping. You could also ask Google, but I sure didn’t. It doesn’t speak to me the same way my mother does (who made me watch Titanic at six – I’ve not recovered).

When someone on YouTube asks me, “What’s the name of the song in your introduction?” I never, never reply with, “Just check the fucking description.” Why? Because a lot of people don’t realise there even is a description for YouTube videos. Again, why? Because most casual users feel like they can interact with the source – in this case: me, video maker – directly through comments.

People like vloggers because they give the impression that they’re your friend and you can chat to them. Most people don’t think of YouTube as an encyclopedia where you take a few minutes of information and then leave, they consider it a place of interaction. A place to spread messages and have discussions.

So why can’t we answer small questions that seem obvious to ‘the rest of us’? Why do we say, “Just fucking Google it?” Don’t you think it deters people – especially bratty teenagers with an attitude problem – from not only engaging with that community ever again, but from developing as a person? I’m not saying we should hand them everything on a silver platter, I’m saying we fucking interact and, oh, here’s a link to the Titanic that will tell you more about it.

Encourage people to do their own research but if they’re asking for help – or being an idiot – point them in the right direction. Nicely.

I would still rather ask my friends, my boyfriend or my Twitter followers – who are all valuable fountains of information and perfectly capable of answering the questions I pose to them – than just Googling it. If that makes me a lazy, stupid person, then fine.

I guess it’s a good thing I can fall back on my ability to discuss and debate with people and say, ‘I THINK YOU’RE WRONG ON THIS ONE’, otherwise where would I be?

This has been Willow. Hit me with all you got, JFGI Lovers. I’m pissed off enough to take it.

You may notice I have a new Blog Page, Essays & Articles, whoo! If you’re a student looking for essays on film, steampunk origins, Hollywood or articles on writing, gaming or writing, then give it a whirl. No tokens needed. It’s currently a seedling of a page and will continue to grow.

Other Blogs:
Why I Hate Your Hero
Top 5 Reasons Why Twitter CRUSHES Facebook
Mass Effect Fans Just Can’t Be Pleased
Why every man MUST read a romance – and every woman a thriller


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